Welcome to The Peaceful Nest’s series: “You’re failing as a Mommy” and other lies we tell ourselves. This is the first post in a 3 part series. You can find the next two posts at the bottom of this page!
I heard the subtle voice in my head. It was a bee buzzing around my ear and simply would not leave.
“You’re a bad mother. Your daughter is going to resent you when she’s older” I heard it loud and clear as I walked down the steps.
I had just put my oldest to bed. We did her normal bedtime routine. She put on her PJ’s, brushed her teeth, then it was into the bed so I could read her one of her favorite bedtime stories.
Afterwards, she asked me tell her a story, per our nightly ritual, so I did.
I painted a beautiful picture of a little girl who lived in the forest with her pet Monkey. They played everyday with their best friends (subsequently named after her cousins and sister). 15 minutes later the story was over and I said “okay kiddo time for bed”.
“No, mommy, I want to tell you a story. As usual her story, always follows up mine with very similar aspects. These are moments I treasure. Trust me. I wouldn’t trade these moments for the world.
But then forty minutes goes by and I tell her “okay B it’s time for bed. You need rest so you have plenty of energy tomorrow.”
“But mommy, can you please tell me just one more story.”
“No kiddo, that is all the stories we have time for tonight.” I say as I kiss her head and walk out her door. She turns over without complaint and nestles further under her covers.
But there is was, that nagging voice inside my head that said “You’re a bad mother. She’s going to resent you when she grows up.”
How ridiculous. I thought to myself.
I had just spent forty minutes telling stories to her. How many more stories do I need to tell so I don’t feel guilty?
This was not the first or last lie that has crept into my mind since having children.
I know I am not alone.
Do they ever creep into your mind while making parenting decisions, in your everyday activities, or maybe while disciplining your children?
“You’re being too hard on her when you discipline her.”
“You’re not disciplining her enough.”
“She doesn’t eat enough.”
“She eats too much.”
“Why can’t you make better parenting decisions?”
“You’re failing them.”
“You’re a terrible mother.”
“You don’t do enough activities with them.”
“You don’t play with them enough.”
Do you ever hear those thoughts in your own mind? “You’re failing as a mom.”
Sure I do not hear them all the time. But they always seem to sneak in when I’m feeling the most vulnerable about my parenting decisions or when my children are in the middle of epic meltdowns.
Why do we listen to these lies?
Are we bombarded with them daily in today’s society? Do we compare ourselves to other mommies?
Do we let the outside world tell us what type of parent we are? Are we afraid other people are judging us? Are we not listening to what God says about us?
I want to tell you today that those thoughts that say you’re failing as a mom sneak in your head are lies.
Do not listen to them.
The lies that sneak in when you are starting to doubt your parenting skills.
When you start to feel discouraged in this parenting journey try remembering what God tells us about ourselves instead!
A kindhearted woman gains respect. -Proverbs 11:16
The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down. -Proverbs 14:1
How happy is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in His ways! You will be happy, and it will go well for you… You…will see your children’s children. -Psalms 128:1-2, 5-6
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. – Proverbs 31:30
And let us not be weary in well-doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not. – Galatians 6:9
When you are feeling down or like you’re failing as a Mommy, remember these verses!
Remember that God created you in your mother’s womb. He knew you before you were born. He knew your children before they were born because he created them too! God gave you the children you have because he knew YOU could raise them!
You are not failing as a Mommy!
You are dong the best you can.
Every child is different.
You know your child the best.
Momma, you know know what your child needs.
You are human and as long as you are loving your child and providing for their needs you are doing great!
YOU ARE A GREAT MOMMY!
and I am sure if you asked your child right now they would say the same thing.
You are a rock star sweet Momma and don’t you forget it!
Do you have a tip to share on becoming a peaceful mom? I would love to hear it! Share your best tips below and I will share them with my readers.
Share Your Best Tips With My Readers.
If you are new to the Peaceful Nest Blog, welcome!
Be sure to read my top posts on parenting:
- Why Consistent Parenting Matters
- 12 Habits of Immensely Peaceful Moms
- 63 Mom Hacks That are Pure Genius
- Connect With Your Child and Build Up Their Heart
Are you looking for ways to become a peaceful mom but you aren’t sure how?
I created a free planner for moms like me, who want to create a peaceful home but let the stress of never having it all together defeat them, because who really ever has it together? The best we can do is plan for peace and roll with the punches, right? If you want your free planner you can get it below!
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Hi there, I’m Jenna! I am a devoted mommy and wife. As well as an advocate for children and creating a peaceful atmosphere for those we love. I co-wrote Faith Actually: Living Life After Tragedy with my husband. I have my Bachelor’s Degree in Biblical Studies and currently working toward my Master’s in Positive Psychology. My number one desire is to create a peaceful home life for my family. My second desire is to share with you the tips I learn along the way!