When it comes to our kids, we, as parents, can have very high expectations.
We want them to excel in school, be well-behaved, and make us proud. But sometimes, our expectations are too high, which can have negative consequences on our children.
In this blog post, we’ll explore why expectations are so important for kids and why they can sometimes be harmful if they’re set too high. We’ll also provide some tips on setting realistic expectations for your children and handling them when your expectations aren’t met.
Why do we set our expectations on our kids too high?
From the time our children are born, we expect certain things from them. We expect them to meet milestones like crawling, walking, and talking at a certain age. And as they grow older, our expectations only increase. We want them to do well in school, make friends easily, and participate in extracurricular activities. Usually, this outlook is driven by a desire to see their children succeed and be happy for many parents. But sometimes, our expectations can be unrealistic – and this is when they can start to cause problems.
When our expectations are too high, it can lead to frustration and disappointment on both sides – parents feel like their kids aren’t meeting their potential, while kids feel like they’re constantly falling short. This can cause tension and conflict in the home and even lead to kids’ behavioral problems. It can also steal their peace of mind and sense of self-worth in some cases.
So how can you tell if you expect too much? One way is to ask yourself if you’re setting developmentally appropriate goals. For example, expecting a toddler to sit still for long periods or be able to read independently are both unrealistic goals. Another way to tell is by observing your child’s behavior – if they seem stressed or anxious, they’re likely too high.
If you think your expectations might be too high, don’t worry – there are ways to change things.
First, try to set realistic goals for your child and give them achievable tasks that will help them feel successful.
Secondly, don’t be too hard on yourself if your goals aren’t always met – kids are humans, after all.
Finally, communicate openly with your kids about what you expect and why it’s essential. This will help them understand what you want from them and make it easier for them to meet your expectations in the future.
What can too high of expectations on our kids do to the peace in your home?
When our expectations for our kids are too high, it can hurt the peace in our home. This is because when kids feel like they’re constantly falling short and failing to meet their parents’ expectations, it can lead to tension and conflict.
What can too high of expectations do to our family?
When expectations are too high, it also puts stress on families. This is because, along with the pressure to meet specific goals, there’s often a lot of emotional baggage that comes with it. For example, if one child is struggling while another is excelling, this can cause friction within the family unit. Additionally, unrealistic expectations can create an atmosphere of fear and anxiety, detrimental to family life.
What happens to kids’ self-esteem when moms’ expect too much?
If expectations are set too high, it can harm kids’ self-esteem. When they feel like they’re constantly falling short, they may start to believe that they’re not good enough or that they’ll never be able to meet their parents’ expectations. In turn, this can lead to feelings of inadequacy and low self-worth. It can also steal their peace of mind and sense of contentment.
Why do we need to reevaluate our expectations of our kids?
Parents need to reevaluate their expectations as kids grow and change from time to time. This is because expectations that were appropriate for a child at one stage of their life may not be suitable for them at another stage. Additionally, it’s important to remember that kids are humans – they’re not perfect, and they’re making mistakes. As parents, it’s our job to help them learn from their mistakes, rather than expecting them never to mess up.
How can you tell when your expectations are too high for your kids?
One way to tell if you expect too much is by observing your child’s behavior. For example, they’re likely too high if they seem stressed or anxious about meeting your expectations. Another way to tell is by asking yourself if you’re setting developmentally appropriate expectations. There are many guides online to help you get a clear picture of what is developmentally appropriate for your child. (But remember, children learn at their own pace!)
How can you set realistic expectations for your children?
One way to set realistic expectations is by giving your child achievable tasks to help them feel successful.
Another way is to communicate openly with your kids about what you expect and why it’s important. This will help them understand what you want from them and make it easier for them to meet your goals in the future.
Finally, don’t be too hard on yourself if your expectations aren’t always met – kids are humans, after all. Try to remember that mistakes are part of the learning process.
How to tell if your expectations are just right?
On the other hand, if you are realistic about what you expect, you’ll likely see a positive change in your child’s behavior. They’ll feel more confident and capable, and they’ll be less likely to experience stress or anxiety.
Additionally, they’ll be more likely to try their best because they know you have faith in them.
Lastly, remember that it’s okay to adjust your goals as needed.
In conclusion, what we expect plays a crucial role in our lives – both for ourselves and our children.
However, when what we expect is too high, it can lead to negative consequences for both kids and parents alike. Therefore, it’s vital for us to be mindful of the expectations we’re setting for our children and to adjust them as needed depending on their age and stage of development. With realistic expectations, we can help our kids feel more confident and capable while assisting them in learning and growing into happy, healthy adults.
Be sure to read my top posts on parenting:
- Why Consistent Parenting Matters
- 12 Habits of Immensely Peaceful Moms
- 63 Mom Hacks That Are Pure Genius
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Hi there, I’m Jenna! I am a devoted mommy and wife. As well as an advocate for children and creating a peaceful atmosphere for those we love. I co-wrote Faith Actually: Living Life After Tragedy with my husband. I have my Bachelor’s Degree in Biblical Studies and currently working toward my Master’s in Positive Psychology. My number one desire is to create a peaceful home life for my family. My second desire is to share with you the tips I learn along the way!